Anti-sex teens vs. reality teens

The Star Tribune has a look at the abstinence-only until marriage versus comprehensive sex education from the point of view of Minnesota teens. One interview they did involved a gay 16 year old, who explains that part of the problem with abstinence-only is it's focus on marriage, and the lack of options for GLBT people to get married to the ones they love.

"The way Sam Ackerberg sees it, telling kids to just say no to sex until they're married doesn't work. Not for everyone and certainly not for him. He's gay.

"For GLBT [gay, lesbian, bisexual, transgendered] high school students, that doesn't apply to them, because right now they can't get married," he said. "You need a program that's going to reach out to everybody."

Last school year, Ackerberg, who is 16 and a student at Edina High School, became an outspoken supporter of comprehensive sex education in schools. He's met with legislators at the State Capitol to push for that approach in all public schools. He's also written letters to high schools across the Twin Cities metro area, asking them what kind of sex-ed program they have in place and arguing that comprehensive sex education is more effective at reducing the risk of sexually transmitted diseases and teen pregnancy than abstinence-only programs.

He's even traveled to Washington, D.C., to participate in a training workshop run by Advocates for Youth, a group of activists promoting safe-sex education in schools.

In a quiet but confident voice, he rattles off statistics on the growing rate of HIV infection among young people. He talks faster as he stresses the urgency he feels is necessary to reach teens before it's too late.

He says being a teenager gives him insight on what teens are doing and what they need to know. For example, he believes schools need to teach sex education sooner than the 10th grade.

"I know just because I'm in high school, I know when kids start having sex. And some kids start before 10th grade," Ackerberg said. "They don't have an education and they don't know how to protect themselves, and a lot of them aren't going out to get condoms."

While he agrees with abstinence proponents that it is best to teach kids that not having sex is the best way to be safe, he said that should not be the only thing that is taught. "There are some kids who will have sex anyway, so say, 'If you are going to have sex, here's how to protect yourself.' "

Sex is an intregal part of life, and something that most people will experience at some point in their life. If we're not teaching teens the entire story of sexuality, how would we expect them as adults to make informed decisions? And what about GLBT youth? We continue to conveniently ignore the fact that a portion of our population cannot get married to the one they love. Without that ability, abstinence-only until marriage is like a slap in the face.

The schools are saying: "Hi. We're not even going to acknowledge your existence as a gay or lesbian people. But you should trust us when we say that the best thing is to wait until your wedding night, which you aren't allowed to have, to engage in sexual intercourse, although we're not going to tell you how that works either."